I aspire to be a great plant person, and a couple of years ago after Christmas, I brought a poinsettia home, determined to keep it alive and thriving.
Now, if you have never cared for a poinsettia, let me tell you … it’s a complicated business. Sure, the first few months are simple enough – give it sunlight, make sure it has water, the usual things. But to get it to produce red leaves by Christmas, you have to give it about 10 hours of sunlight and 14 hours of complete darkness every day starting in September.
Going into this endeavor, I didn’t know what it needed to thrive. It was alive but only green in late October, and when I Googled how to get it to turn red for Christmas, I realized I was already behind!
My roommate and I started a ridiculous routine of putting it next to the sunniest window every morning and putting it in the laundry room after work. We were persistent, and by mid-January, we had beautiful red leaves – but wow, it had taken a lot of intentional effort!
I think a lot of us assume that raising teens who stay Catholic after being confirmed is like caring for a plant – you give them the right amount of sunshine and water (aka, religious education and youth group retreats) and it’ll all work out for the rest of their lives. But raising Catholics in today’s world is not simple and is like caring for a poinsettia: it takes a lot of intentionality, perseverance, and trust in the Holy Spirit.
Unfortunately, it’s common for many teens to stop showing up the weekend after they are confirmed. Now you might wonder, why would they go through all the preparation just to stop practicing the faith?
Welcome to the modern conundrum, where teens may see the Church as an extracurricular activity – equal to marching band, less important than travel soccer leagues. So sure, for one year, they can please grandma and get that confirmation picture, but to stick around and see the gifts of the Holy Spirit bear fruit? That’s a big ask, and we know it.
The saints and martyrs knew it as they laid down their lives for the Gospel. The people in the pews know it, too: the lectors, core team members, parish staff, and the parents with energetic toddlers know that faith demands much of us! But we also know it is worth it.
This is what the New Evangelization is all about – turning to the people who are already in the Catholic fold and showing them, in word and in action, why the Good News is life-changing. Post-confirmation teens know about Jesus, but sometimes their hearts haven’t embraced the reality of it all. They need your witness of how Christ is moving, and they need your accompaniment as they form lifelong priorities and goals.
How do you do this? Like I said before, you will need to be intentional and persistent, asking the Holy Spirit to fill you and the teens whom God places in your life. This isn’t just for youth ministers, sponsors, and parents. We are all called to give witness to the Good News.
First, pray for all of the post-confirmation teens in your parish. Even the ones who are already on fire need your prayers!
Second, be ready to share your testimony. When have you encountered Christ in the Eucharist? When did you rely on God, and he showed up? Which saints inspire you to live a life of virtue?
Third, pursue their questions. Soon enough, they will make decisions about college, careers, and vocations. Encourage them to invite Christ into those choices. When they are passionate about something faith-related, help them take the next step by introducing them to the music minister, going with them to the soup kitchen, or buying the prayer journal.
Lastly, don’t give up on them. Invite them to Mass if they miss a week. Give the sign of peace to the teen sitting alone. Celebrate the joy of our new pope with them. Balance persistence with merciful compassion, and remember that it’s never too late for those leaves to turn red.
Just like nurturing my poinsettia was made easier with the help of my roommate, helping confirmed teens become lifelong disciples is easier when there is more than just one person working on it. And above all, entrust them to the Holy Spirit – that’s the only way for any of us to thrive.
Katie Yankoski is the associate director of youth and young adults in the Office for Evangelization. She leads the contemporary band at St. Edward the Confessor, Richmond, where she used to be youth minister. Though often mistaken as an extrovert, she recharges on days off by reading and baking.