Church uses different words for one sacrament

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Question:

While I know that only confession will reconcile me with God, I am confused about the terminology used in my parish. (We are a rural parish in Virginia and have very few opportunities for confession, but there is always the chance to make a private appointment for confession.)

Any scheduled confessions are announced as reconciliation, and I am not clear as to what to expect when I go. Sometimes there is a reconciliation service followed by confessions; other times there are only confessions.

Does the Church no longer recognize a difference between the reconciliation service (which was to prepare us for confession) and the sacrament of confession (which is private). In other words, is there still a sacrament of confession or is it now called the sacrament of reconciliation? (Courtland)

Answer:

Generally, the sacrament of penance can be called confession or reconciliation, and the three terms are used interchangeably. In fact, the Catechism of the Catholic Church (Nos. 1423-24) lists several names by which the same sacrament can be designated.

These include: the sacrament of conversion, the sacrament of penance, the sacrament of confession, the sacrament of forgiveness and the sacrament of reconciliation.

The catechism notes that “the disclosure or confession of sins to a priest is an essential element of this sacrament” (No. 1424).

Sometimes parishes offer reconciliation services that include prayers and scriptural readings on forgiveness, as well as a homily on the same topic. It would be good for a local church to mention in advance what the format will be for the sacrament — in particular so that parishioners can know how much time to allow.

Question:

When I was an evangelical, the standard take on Mary’s virginity was that she remained a virgin until after the birth of Jesus, but afterward went on to have normal marital relations with Joseph, which produced up to six more children.

These ideas were based on passages like Matthew 1:25 (“He had no relations with her until she bore a son, and he named him Jesus”) and Matthew 13:55 (“Is not his mother named Mary and his brothers James, Joseph, Simon and Judas? Are not his sisters all with us?”).

Now, as a Catholic, I am told that Joseph was significantly older than Mary, was a widower with adult children from his first marriage and that Jesus’ “brothers and sisters” were more like stepbrothers and stepsisters.

Could not Mary still have attained “Queen of Heaven and Earth” status without being a perpetual virgin? (Indiana)

Answer:

As to your specific question, whether Mary could be thought of as queen of heaven and earth without having been a perpetual virgin, the answer, of course, is yes. But that is not the issue here. The teaching of Mary’s perpetual virginity is one of the longest defined dogmas of the Church. It was taught by the earliest Church fathers, including Tertullian, St. Athanasius, St. Ambrose and St. Augustine, and it was officially declared a dogma at the fifth ecumenical council at Constantinople in 553.

As to the scriptural passages to which you refer, I would make two points. First, the footnote in the New American Bible explains Matthew 1:25: “The Greek word translated ‘until’ does not imply normal marital conduct after Jesus’ birth, nor does it exclude it.”

As to your other scriptural reference, the words here in their original language do not mean simply biological brothers or sisters but could apply to other relatives such as stepbrothers or stepsisters or cousins.

There is one tradition that says that Joseph was a widower who married the Virgin Mary later in life after already having a family with his first wife. One is free to believe that, but this is why I would have my doubts. From the cross, Jesus entrusted Mary’s care to the apostle John.

If Jesus had had surviving siblings, that would most likely not have happened. Normal Jewish practice would have Jesus’ siblings at the cross, and the eldest surviving son would be entrusted with the care of his mother.

Question:

I am an 88-year-old Korean War veteran with a question that is not earth-shattering but one that bothers me almost every day. I talk and pray to God, to Jesus and to the Blessed Virgin Mary out loud — every morning and at night before I go to bed. (I live alone.)

But there are also times when I pray silently — just in my head — especially if I wake up during the night. So what I need to know is whether those prayers — the silent ones — are heard. (Georgia)

Answer:

Please relax and be at peace. The Lord (and Mary, too) hears all our prayers, including the silent ones. In fact, the Bible speaks directly to that. The Letter to the Hebrews says: “The word of God is living and effective … penetrating even between soul and spirit … able to discern reflections and thoughts of the heart” (4:12).

Even when we are burdened and find prayer difficult, the Lord is there to help us. Paul’s Letter to the Romans says that the Spirit “comes to the aid of our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit itself intercedes with inexpressible groanings” (8:26).

So God can hear our thoughts just as easily as he can hear our words. This may serve as a helpful reminder; even our thoughts should be kind and prayerful, too.

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